She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
are you inviting me to ice cream?
the subtext of everything i say to you is inviting you to ice cream
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