Have you finally orgasmed yet?
i can't put facebook on my resume under hobbies.
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
My dick just stopped my iPhone from falling into the toilet.
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
Randomize