I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Randomize
