You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
I'm at about main and main street
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
Randomize