ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
I'm going to text my booty call and tell him nevermind, that I got the job finished by myself. That will teach him to text back faster.
This lesson is brought you by a psychology class.
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
We are all done wearing pants today
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
Randomize
