I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
Randomize
