your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
Someone sent me a drink from across the bar. It was water.
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
Dude, they're still mid-coitus. Pretty sure running in to high five my roommate mid-thrust is a mood-breaker.
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
Randomize
