Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
Does it bother you that I left your underwear hanging in a tree at the zoo? i think the turtles are enjoying it.
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
how do you say “i know we haven’t hung out in a month, but i gave myself an amazing orgasm to your picture the other day” without coming on too strong
Randomize
