I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
The only reason I kept his number in my phone for so long is so that hed pay for my abortion.
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
We just started the day with vitamin bombs. Daily vitamin + whatever's left in your glass from last night = feel like a champion
I just can't deal with that sentence
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
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