you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
My Sexting was not on an AP level
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
Randomize
