your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
I used a jello pudding cup as a shot chaser last night. I'm the Bill Cosby of alcoholics
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
Randomize
