we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
I totally just used John Mayer's lyrics to get laid.
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
Every time I walk onto campus my Saint Patrick's day scar starts to throb. I'm like a drunken accident prone Harry Potter
The lady at the Humaine Society gave me her nephew's number because I seem like a loving and caring person.
Does she know that each time you've adopted a new cat in the past year it's because some guy stopped fucking you and you don't want to eat your feelings?
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
The FEDEX guy just cock blocked me by getting his van stuck in my driveway
Randomize
