batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
He brought a TOOTHBRUSH and TOOTHPASTE with us on our date..... I want to go home and forget I ever decided to be nice and go on this date in the first place...... A TOOTHBRUSH!?!?!
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
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