that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
Well you ended up trying to convince two Greek girls that you were Greek, but failed massively by shouting at them in Spanish, and then almost vomiting after taking way too much snuff. Maybe lay off the guinness next time?
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
Randomize
