I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
Lo siento on account of my penis...
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
Randomize
