He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
I think I broke my toilet with my head. There are ceramic pieces everywhere. and I might still be drunk.
Randomize
