Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
i'm sleeping with myself tonight because i remember my name and i won't regret it in the morning. sorry.
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize