if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
i really appreciated the lovely drunk rendition of whitney houstan's "i wanna dance with somebody" you left on my voicemail.
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
Is this like a preordered booty call?
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
Don’t worry I was with my ex husband for 10 years and he could never remember the year I was born, when our dating anniversary was or what year I graduated high school. But I still know that mother fuckers SSN lol
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
Randomize