I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
Wait, how is it that I'm just getting ready to go out and you're already showing your penis to freshmen girls?
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
I wrote myself a letter, like I think drunk me wants to be pen pals or something
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
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