i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
You don't understand. On her lunch break she sits on the roof, stares into the sky, and chain smokes. I can't get on her level. She is made up of java monsters with whiskey and a voice that sounds like sex.
You need to stop crushing on your boss or fuck her.
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
YOU HAVE PISSED AND FUCKED ON LITERALLY EVERYTHING IN MY HOUSE
Not everything, just a few things. And only a few times. The odds are really not all that bad when you break it down.
you’ve pissed every time you slept over. there’s no such thing as odds anymore. it’s guaranteed
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
Randomize
