Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
After I was arrested and in the back of the squad, she lit a cig. I politely stuck my head through the glass opening and asked for a drag. She instantly slammed my head back, blew smoke at me and shut the glass. My view on state trooper chicks is forever tainted.
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
The people at subway are so judgy when you stop to get a sandwhich on your walk of shame
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
Randomize
