Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
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