you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
I'm FaceTiming Pizza Hut.
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
Randomize
