when im not freaking out about dying alone and unloved, i actually really enjoy being single
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
Ryan friended me on LinkedIn and it took everything in my power not to endorse him for sexual dysfunction as a skill.
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
He's 30 years old and woke me up for a hand job. Last time I go home with someone I met through Tinder.
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
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