i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
He just got dropped off drinking a flask, sitting on the handlebars of a chinese delivery man's bike
Tonight's gonna be epic. Did he bring my noodles?
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
This little girl and her dad are walking behind me. "Why is he wearing pajamas?" Mind your own business, kid.
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
Randomize
