I can tell how much and what I drank by my morning shits
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
In my next life I better get to be a bird. Fuck flying. I'm gonna shit on your car. Every. Day.
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
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