So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
I booty texted him nothing but three exclamation points at 3:05am and he was in my bed 17 minutes later, lest you think punctuation is not important.
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
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