he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
You said you brought chipotle into a movie and I asked you to marry me and you said yes
My Sexting was not on an AP level
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
Randomize
