Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
dude you need a shock collar for some of the things you say when you're drunk.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
mid-sex she goes "oh my god. you aren't even going to remember my name in the morning, are you?". And i was so wasted that i straight up told her "honestly, I don't even remember your name right now"
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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