Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
In honor of the new administration, I'm going to make it my goal this weekend to get some lesbian action. Fuck Donald Trump and fuck Mike Pence. I'm going to be a spiteful gay.
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
Randomize
