I might come over and watch a movie but I can't spend the night. my parents would wonder where i was
you're 26.
The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
Something in my vomit makes me think I shouldn't have had that slurpee
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
Randomize