I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
We're just Facebook friends. Use guy logic. I tapped your wife in high school, 20 years and 60 lbs ago, when she was hot and experimental. Why would I mess with that now? It would ruin the vivid memories of her that I keep in my spank bank.
I will find you...
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
Randomize