you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
Randomize
