She announced her abortion via fbk
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
Randomize
