why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
it was like his penis was on wheels.
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
In my junk email folder, there are literally 67 messages from Alcoholics Anonymous. What..the fuck.
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
Randomize