You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
Our house smells like week old pizza, beer cans, cigarettes, and depressing career tracks....get lysol.
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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