i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
Randomize