She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
A little boy in a bathroom stall just shouted "mom where's your penis?? Is it inside you?"
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
My father has a definite type: blonde, busty, 18-22. It was awkward when I was in college, but now I'm over it. I play wingman for him and he buys me expensive purses for the assistance in getting him hooked up with girls younger than me. Win-win.
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