I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
Randomize
