it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
he puts the penis in happiness.
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
Part of me was thinking I should go old school and get a chasity belt before the semester starts. Really lock that shit down. But then I thought, fuck that. I'm going to hit that campus like an f5 whorenado
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
I don't understand why she gets annoyed by my drunk texts. It means she's who I'm thinking about even when my brain isn't functioning properly.
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
Randomize
