no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
I just found a list in your handwriting titled "Places I've Peed." The National Mall and 'under the second bridge after the bend in the road' are two of the tamer entries. I tip my hat.
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
It's okay that we broke up and all but it's not okay that he still has my Chick-fil-A calendar card. This month is free fries!
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
Randomize
