D3 body, D1 cock
hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
Sober January is a disaster.
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
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