shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
getting your period on valentines day is like an extra little fuck you, now you REALLY have no chance of sex tonight.
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
Oh I had the weirdest dream in which I was an archeologist stealing a golden dildo from a snobby British person
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