problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
He called me at two in the morning to tell me he was throwing the tiny Thor hammer at moving vehicles. Apparently he missed the guy on the motorcycle.
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
Randomize