I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
I woke up in a house cuddled up with a beagle on a futon. have no idea who anyone is but they all call me stretch. yeaaahhh boiiiiii
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
EVERY guy that's EVER been in my vagina has texted me tonight for a booty call. Narrow it down to the greatest hits or just work in timeline order?
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
It all started with a game of naked twister.
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
