Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
I'm wayyy too drunk to be in a parade right now
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
I woke up at 4am on the floor covered in olive oil and fire extinguisher powder but all I wanted to know was where the rest of my booze was at.
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
Randomize
