Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
This strange Italian man told me he wants to take me for ice cream and kept calling me "tomato" from tinder
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
Randomize
