my dad wants uyo to call him right now...reverse drunk dialing
Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
you set the microwave for an hour telling me that the done sound was your alarm.
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
Randomize
