i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
Just got a message from a guy on a dating site who says he helped me remove lime pulp from my eye in a club toilet 2 weeks ago.
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
If you fuck up my birthday by dying I will kick your fucking corpse.
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
The streets are paved with hand jobs
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