I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
Randomize
