somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
This beer is not sobering me up at all
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
Randomize
