Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
she pinky promised me she was 18
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
Randomize
